A surrogacy journey, jointly documented by Surrogate and Intended Mother.

Wednesday, 17 October 2012

The booking in appointment

A booking in appointment is seemingly mundane appointment for most women out there I imagine, but I woke up on Monday morning raring to go and feeling very excited. I think not being the one carrying LHH, days like Monday feel extra special and precious, as it makes it all seem much more real, rather than like an incredible dream.

I drove up to Coventry as our care has now been taken over by Niki's local hospital. After some cuddles with the kids and a lot of nattering, Niki & I set off for our appointment. Once we got to the waiting room a sudden wave of nerves hit me. What if the midwife didn't approve of this situation? Could she make things difficult or perhaps not even want me in the room? (Not that Niki would have let that happen - we already have some good arguments lined up for any difficulties we may encounter!). It's a shame that these things cross your mind but sadly not everyone fully understands surrogacy, and with ignorance come negative reactions.

As it turned out, I was worrying about nothing. Our midwife (sadly only covering short term) was absolutely lovely. She was chatty and cheerful, and excited for us all. When I explained a bit about my history and how long it's taken us to get here, she exclaimed "well no wonder you're so excited!" so I'm assuming my attempt at giving off an air of cool calm and collected mother-to-be was not very successful.

Unfortunately I think we must have given her a headache as we certainly did not fit into her booklet of tickboxes which she had to fill out. After a call to a more senior midwife and some creative adding of extra boxes and columns, the form filling began. It was tricky because some of the questions applied to Niki (eg: previous birth history) some to me and/or Adam (genetic screening information) and even some to Steve (environmental factors). She did a fab job of squeezing all the info in and making it a very positive hour and 45 minutes (seriously - the poor woman) despite the huge number of questions and large amount of information.

Our next appointment will be the 12 week scan, which we don't yet have a date for. I'm already very nervous and very excited about that day, one of my concerns being whether both Adam and I will be allowed into the scan room (standard regulations are 1 person plus the person being scanned) but we'll tackle that when we get there. In the mean time, it's our wonderful Niki who's suffering all the morning sickness, heartburn and tiredness, and Steve who is supporting her through it and therefore supporting our LHH. Two utterly amazing people who are taking us a step closer to this incredible dream each day, and who we will never be able to thank fully for this gift.

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