A surrogacy journey, jointly documented by Surrogate and Intended Mother.

Sunday, 29 July 2012

The agreement session

As we mentioned on the last 2 posts, at SUK the team need to carry out an agreement session before commencing treatment. Having been given a little wiggle room to allow Niki to start her jabs on the correct day, we got to agreement day yesterday. Adam and I traveled up to Coventry on Friday, and after scoffing down a very scrummy lasagne, spent a lovely evening meeting Steve's family. It was fantastic to spend some time with Niki's children Jack and Beth again; Adam and I are so chuffed that they seem to really like us. Friday night was a late one, and part way through the evening, Jack snuggled up on me and fell asleep - I took this as a huge complement and was v touched that he felt comfortable and happy enough with me to do so. 

On Saturday morning, Adam and I headed over to Niki and Steve's for the agreement, picking up brunch on the way. The agreement is essentially a large form with lots of questions on it, which ensure that you've all thought about and talked about the ins and outs of a surrogate pregnancy. They are questions that if you were having a "normal" pregnancy, the couple would be thinking about, however of course in surrogacy there are 4 people working very hard to make this happen, and it's important that the answers given are right for everyone. Some of the questions are simple, some are more difficult to contemplate (such as what would happen in the event of a stillbirth) but all are very important. 

The lovely Vee from SUK came to do our agreement for us - she is one of SUK's experienced surrogates so was able to offer us advice as we went through the forms. We had all discussed the questions thoroughly in advance before hand, so knew there were no issues, and the session went very smoothly. Vee left, and Niki and Steve suddenly got out 2 little packages - they had bought Adam and I gifts to congratulate us on reaching this landmark stage. I was completely overwhelmed by the whole thing and couldn't speak, so in good old Thackray tradition, sobbed on Niki's shoulder instead. 

I have no doubt that this will get boring as I will keep saying it, but my awe and wonder for these two  knows no bounds. They are doing all this for us. They are going through all of this to try and help us start a family. I mean, that's huge isn't it? Unfathomably huge. And the additional support and friendship they're giving is invaluable. We really are hugely lucky.

They're all heading down to Surrey tomorrow for a week of Teamie fun and we're really looking forward to it! Watch this space for updates and photos...

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